Monday, December 3, 2012
What a week.
I know lots of you will relate and can totally understand when I tell you that our dog Moose is a part of our family. He's not just a pet, he's part of us and we love that little bundle of fur just like we was one of our kids.
This week has be hard. I haven't sleep, I'm not eating well, I can't concentrate and being in the spirit of the season just hasn't hit yet. My mind is constantly on Moose.
I have had such a gut wrenching time. As of this writing he is still at the animal hospital. He did have pancreatitis. We had hoped that after a weeks stay he would be on the road to recovery, but he's not.
We visited Saturday and Sunday. Saturday had us in a bit of an optimistic mood. Moose was excited to see us. He was up and moving and even drank some water and went outside for a bit. He gave us kisses and was wagging his tail. He looked terrible tough. The vet techs had warned us that they had to "give him a hairdo". He looked like a cross between a samurai and Gene Simmons. His hair was spiked up and held in place with gauze. His face was a mess and his little leg was shaved and covered in pink gauze. Pink. Really?
I left with the feeling that we was on the very slow road to recovery. The vet tech told us that after we left, he chewed through his nylon leash and wandered into the waiting room looking for us. Hearing that just broke our hearts.
Sunday we returned and there was no tail wagging. There were no kisses. He was mopey. He begrudgingly went outside. I made him some chicken with the hopes that maybe he would eat Mama's food. He refused.
The vet tech told us that the recent blood work indicated that he may have a blockage in his bile duct. What did that mean? I left in a flood of tears. I cried all the way home. I cried all afternoon. I was inconsolable. The doctor was supposed to call around 1pm. At least that is what the vet tech told us. 1pm came and no call. 2pm. 3pm.....nothing. I was beside myself. Finally John called and asked the answering service to contact him. He called us back around 4pm.
He said he thinks Moose has an internal obstruction, not an external one which would be worse. Good news. After an ultrasound today to confirm his suspicions, he'll go on prednisone. We call prednisone the miracle pill. Moose took it when he was sick back in 2010 and it was amazing how quickly he got better.
It's going to be a long day waiting to hear.
I'm praying and hoping for good news.
There hasn't been much cooking, baking or photo taking going on here. My poor men have had to fend for themselves almost all week. I've been so down that I barely had any desire or energy to cook. I said to John at one point " I cannot imagine how someone coping with a loved ones illness can function" How to you live with the constant worry? How does their illness not consume your every waking moment?
I'm a total mess. This week has knocked me on my ass.
I just need Moose back home. I need the churning in my stomach to go away. I need to wake up and see that tail wagging happily at me, I need to take him on his morning walk again, I need to get back in the kitchen and cook, I need to pick up my camera again. I need everything to go back to normal.
Thank you for sticking around while I go through this rough patch.
I'd love your good vibes and prayers.