Saturday, October 9, 2010

Love is the answer, and you know that for sure.

john lennon

I remember where I was when I heard John Lennon was murdered, in the kind of way people of my parents generation remember where they were when Kennedy was killed, and I suppose the way most of us now can answer the "where were you?" question when it comes to 911.

I remember seeing my Dad, almost in tears. They shared the same birthday.

Staring at the TV screen. Not believing what I was hearing.

Watching the fans gather at the Dakota, wishing I was there.

I cried and cried. I was inconsolable. I was 16.

I had just gotten my copy of Double Fantasy. The album, remember those?

I was so excited that he was finally releasing a new album. I listened to it over and over again, even the Yoko songs, lol.

His voice spoke to me, touched me. I always felt a connection with him. I still do today.

So these last 30 years he has been gone from this world, but he has always been a part of my life.

In the songs I sang to my kids when I rocked them to sleep. Jesse would lay in my arms and say "sing the Sean song to me" (Beautiful Boy) and at the end when John whispered "good night Sean, see you in the morning", I would replace the Sean with Jesse and he would giggle.

He is a part of the all Beatles lullaby's we sang in our big old water bed. One baby under each arm, singing Two of Us while I tapped out the beat on the side of the bed.

He's there every year when we play Happy Xmas, War is Over when we place the star on the top of the tree, or when we play Birthday when it's you're special day.

He sang at my wedding.

His voice always a part of all the special moments in my life.

30 years later and I still miss him so much it hurts.

I think about all the music that was still to come. Lost.

I light a candle every October 9th and on December 8th too.

On this day when you would have turned 70, I hope that somehow my little birthday message reaches you wherever you are. Thank you for being the soundtrack of my life.

This is one of my favorite songs.

Stop and rest for just 2:39 minutes and listen.



Happy Birthday John (and Dad too!).

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